Not Quite Mid-Cycle

My interview season, like I said, has become less of a period that defines the next four years of my life, and more of a journey towards self-realization. In my search for a solution to the anxiety that plagued me in the beginning of this year, I instead found ways to strengthen my spirit in ways I did not expect. I listened to Brene Brown, found The Confidence Code, took some advice from Frankel, spoke with mental health professionals, played with MBTI, then delved into figuring out exactly what I loved and what I want out of this long, winded road to a medical degree.

I have become increasingly comfortable with my story, which I often felt I needed to explain. I traced my discomfort regarding my non-traditional status to my inherent dislike for being outside of the norm. I found that both strange and fascinating, since I had never really belonged to one particular cultural group, in school, at work, and in life. I lived in countries whose languages I didn't understand. I was always an outsider.

So, now, I am working on owning my past and my personality for what they are. I am embracing that my path is not at all traditional. My nursing background, my immigrant status, my age, my love for all things unconventional while forever needing community -- these all define me, though, even collectively, they do not quite succeed in answering the question of who I am. I am even working on accepting my ambition for what it is, instead of trying to shove my desire to grow under the proverbial rug for fear that the knowledge of my need to achieve would suddenly deem me unlovable.

But these little details about my introspection don't really interest you, do they? You probably want to know how my cycle is going. Well, folks, it's going splendidly! Feel free to ask me in private if you're curious about exactly how splendidly this year is turning out for yours truly.


Love,

Your Friendly Neighborhood Premed Brain Nurse